"An artist's goal is not to live forever, it's to create something that will."We can talk about the stress of fame or the strain of artistic freedom and expression once you've made it. We can talk about demons and pain. We can even discuss addiction as a way to understand the hows and whys of a persons breakdown. I choose not to do this today. I would just like to remind all of us what it's like being a creative type.
There are voices and colors that no one can see but you. There are melodies and sonnets swirling around always a foot taller than you can reach. There are movies that play out in your head so vivid the extras have names--first and last. There's a feeling that no one will ever "get you"...understand your art...know your true intent. You may want to decode it for them but that would be akin to pulling back the curtain on the great Oz.
I've lived in my head so long I don't know real memories from my own creation. My brain is a bad Inception movie chopped and screwed.
No matter the art when it comes...when the muse takes over... it can be the most glorious orgasmic rush ever. When it plays hide & seek behind impenetrable glass. Man...
When you have so much stuff going on that you can't wrangle the art, it's feels like the ultimate fuck. The one thing that could save you becomes the one thing you can't make behave. You can't tell the creation to wait until you have more money or fix the car. You can't tell it to wait until you've gone through rehab or kicked that addiction. You can't tell it to be still until the kids go to sleep. You can't tell the voices to stop waking you up at night.
Art doesn't care. Art doesn't give a damn. Art is a compulsion that you must honor.
God bless the ones who become well known and famous for it. God bless the ones who can manage and keep it flowing through all the stuff they endure. God bless the Beyonces and Kanyes of the world who can't take a vacation without it haunting them. God bless the Lauryns who create but are too afraid to share. God bless the Heaths and the Kurts who let it consume them to the very end. God bless the Adeles who fear expressing it front of others. And God bless the Amys who held on to it tighter than they could their own selves.
"It's not easy to hold on to yourself when others hold on to you"
|Amy Winehouse RIP|